Quarantine Day 26

How are all of you doing? Stay at Home orders have been in place for far too long and we are all going a bit crazy. Please don’t take that the wrong way. I 100% agree with the order and understand why it’s in place. What will the world look like when we go back to “normal”? It will be a new normal that is for sure. Will we look people in the eye and shake their hand? Will we lean in for a hug! I picture it will look like the opening scene of Love Actually and I pray that I am envisioning this correctly.

Pray. This is one of those times you either lean stronger into your faith or you doubt God for the large amount of sadness that is happening. I choose to believe. I choose to pray. I choose, most of the time, to look at the good that is coming out of this. There are enough emotions flowing in and out of me so quickly that I can not focus on the bad and the sad. It is not that I am in denial of the lives we are losing. The numbers overwhelm me. My chest tightens and it makes me wonder what if…I chose to not go there for my mental health. My family needs me on top of my game. I am all ready struggling so I chose to turn to God.

There is good happening all around us. I am thankful that at the end of the day, or in the middle when I just need a break, that my Facebook and Instagram feed is full of Goodness. Kindness. Love. Live music. If your feed is not like that and social media is causing you angst I suggest you get off of it. Or take this time to unfollow some people. A warning though, emotions are running high, even the good things may make you cry.

Some have this new found time. Me? I feel more wiped at 7:00 PM than I did pre Covid-19! I think it is the multitasking between work, teacher and being mom all at once all day long. I am blessed to be at home and working. It’s a once in a lifetime opportunity and I would not change it. I practically see the lightbulbs turn on above the girls’ heads as they work through schoolwork. It warms my heart and soul- I may have teared up some too. When schoolwork is complete it’s time to keep them busy, happy and fed while I tend to my paying job. It’s no wonder I have no energy once the day is over. I am not complaining that I am not re-organizing our closets or deep cleaning the refrigerator. This is what I am supposed to be doing at this moment. If my closets are not tidy it is ok. If my clean laundry is not put away it is ok. If there are Barbie toys are literally all over the living room, kitchen, porch, hallway and the deck…it is ok. IT IS ALL OK.

Sanity? What is keeping me sane at this moment? Seeing the positive ways that people are coming together. WE are ALL in this TOGETHER. How cool is that? Why does it take something so awful to bring us together. WE NEED to keep this up after this settles down, NOT SHOULD, it is a NEED (The Crossroads of Should and Must by Elle Luna). What are you doing to do to remember what we are learning from this? I am still figuring this out. It probably will incorporate a list *smile*

What is working for you to keep smiling during this time? Here are things helping me feel whole:

Cooking meals in our kitchen

Communication with family and friends FaceTime, snail mail (sending and receiving), reading Bible devotions through the YouBible app

Listening to music- May I recommend Alicia Keys’ Underdog as a super motivational song. Or search Covid-19 in iTunes or Spotify for some great playlists.

Walking through fresh air (and mud)

Escaping into a book

A Good Neighborhood by Therese Anne Fowler was my latest read from Book of the Month. Well written however not quite the ending I was hoping for.

Minnesota has not hits its peak yet. They say maybe mid-June this will happen. That sounds so far away. Yet the last 26 days have gone by “quickly”. I pray for our health. I pray we have all learned and are learning positive things from this and I pray we don’t lose site of those things. I am going to end there as I can feel the tears forming once again. I have not cried like this since prior to having kids. Life has been a whirlwind since then. I felt plenty of emotions in the past (almost) 8 years, but its been difficult to really feel them and take time for them.

Love to all who reads this.

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